It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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