if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
