i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
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