He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
