i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
