so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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