So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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