we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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