So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
