I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize