dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
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Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
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I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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