Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
