She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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