I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
