Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I just blew my weed a kiss
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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