john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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