But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
