I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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