you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
