I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize