I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize
