why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
