mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i think my mom watched the whole time
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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