it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
