she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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