Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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