so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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