Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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