Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
