Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
dude you need to get laid
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Your face is a jimmy john
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
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