STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
