u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
