Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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