i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
