I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
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