Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
