At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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