Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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