I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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