Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize