He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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