Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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