Yo dont text me then not text me
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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