She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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