eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
