Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
