Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Farmville is her only friend.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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