So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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