If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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