I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Randomize
